Showing posts with label fulltime mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fulltime mom. Show all posts

NOW A "LEGIT" STAY-AT-HOME WIFE AND MOM

I have always been proud on how I was able to get around the house, serve Bryan, take care of Risen, do rakets and handle ministry opportunities with a smile on my face.  I have to be honest that it was easy to juggle all this because we had support from our kasambahay.  However, the past few days I had the same goal, only this time without help. 

It is Mother’s day today and we are officially with no kasambahay for almost a week now.  I really thought my world would end without her, but surprisingly, it gets better each day.  I know that the days ahead may not be easy as they were, but to be honest, I am getting the hang of it (or is this too early to say? haha).

How am I coping?  I decided to take one step at a time.  My morning starts with sending Bryan off, then devotions then Risen.  Then, when I have spare time in between Risen, I clean up, do the laundry (Praise God for automatic washing machines!!), and then the other errands.  Our house is definitely messier and plates are often left in the sink, but that should be okay.  That is just really okay  (yes, I am still convincing myself on this area hihi).

Today, as I gaze around our tiny home and read the heartwarming mother’s day greetings, I can’t help but thank God for once again raising the bar of His expectations from me.  I am a wife and a mom…a legit stay-at-home wife and mom.  I miss working full time, the help we used to get, but I am grateful God initiated to take all this from me.  In all honesty, if these two will be offered, I would decline (PS we had the best kasambahay and it was hard to let her go).  Why?  Because I have found my calling in serving my boys intentionally.  My heart has found peace in what I do now.  I would not trade it for anything!!

Definitely tough times ahead but I am assured because God is with me all the way!



FULL TIME FREELANCER AT HOME

Drum roll pls!!!!

I am now working with ManilaWorkshops as a Workshop Director!  Woot woot!!
I can't believe that I would soon be invloved in my two favorite things:  Learning and Events
Thank youuuuuu, Jesus!

I have always wanted to do something like this, however, I have always been afraid of the Marketing side.  Plus, I am not sure of what to do, how to do, where to do and all the other aspects of it. Thankfully, Ginger Arboleda (who is super nice and down to earth) of Manila Workshops allowed me to pitch-in my ideas and skills in her company. What we (naks, we na talaga!!  kasama na talaga ako haha) do is prepare workshops for all kinds of people:  from food phototography, entrepreneurship, motherhood, crafts, car maintenance,  etc.  Haaayyyy, just thinking about it makes me soooo kilig!

My first assignment is a series of live Webinar on Entrepreneurship.  We have 10 topics (2 hour per session) for a bundle price of 3999.  And since this is a Webinar, it is like learning from the comforts of your bed! How fun and stress-free, diba?




I have been waiting the longest for something like this.  Grateful for Bianca Ravanes who asked me if I would be willing to try and to Ginger Arboleda for trusting me with her events, materials and guides!  This is the closest thing I could get to being a classroom teacher. I am already so excited for the workshops I will prepare which I can also learn from.  

And once again, God has proven His faithfulness and timing. Thank you, thank you, Jesus!!!




PRI-YOU-RITY

Risen had his second birthday on a Thursday.  This means that it will be a "normal schedule". Bryan will go to work at 6am and I will have to teach for 2-3 hours in the morning plus a "few things" here and there.  However, since it was Risen's day, I decided to continue with our usual routine but make sure to give all my energy, eyes, dedication and focus on him.  I made it certain that except for my online work, no other little things will be done.

When I woke up I already had my schedule in mind.  I would have devotions, teach for 2 hours then Risen and I would play, be silly, read aloud, extend bath time, sing, write on doors using chalk, bike outide, buy Stick-O, etc.  When Bryan arrived at around 3:30, the play and fun continued.  At the end of his big day, I was like, why am I a happier mother today?

I suddenly realized because maybe I lived our day without thinking of anything.  I did not mind not being able to do this and that. I did not get pissed having to postpone "other" things because Risen wanted to play.  It dawned on me that this is the true meaning of priority.  Not getting frustrated because my main concern held me back, but being able to let go of the "other things" because of who or what needs me the most.


image not mine
As I mentioned in one of my posts before, full-time moms may easily forget the reason behind their "vocation".  Risen's birthday reminded me that he is my priority (aside from God and Bryan, of course) so I should not worry or get bad irritated when I do not get things done.  I too should not feel unproductive when what I did all day is play with my toddler.  I am a stay-at-home mom because of Risen and not because of the other things.

This season is for Risen.  While Bryan is at work, our son is all mine.  He thinks I am his world so I will give it to him.  The others can wait up until his nap time.

How about you? Is your priority really your priority?



A LETTER FOR MY TODDLER

Risen,

A day before your birthday, I decided to put off work, a proper lunch, and other errands so I can rest because I was feeling really unwell since 6am.  When I entered our room, you were sleeping soundly so I was glad because I knew I could catch some snooze too.  However, when I was about to enter the dreamland, you cried a little and for some reasons, was not able to go back to sleep.  At 12:30 (you were supposed to wake up at 1:30 pa) you decided to play with your floaters while I was hungry, sick, sleepy  and with tons of to-do-list on my head.  I thought to myself if I should go ballistic, pero hindi eh.  I smiled as I watched you walk around with phone chargers hanged on your neck.  Under the blanket and all the sneezing, I was thankful for your life, your father and God.

Babe, thank you for making mommy as patient, as loving, as understanding and as selfless now.  I am now on the other side of the world because of you.  Yes, maybe my life would also be good if I decided to remain single and childless, pero, I do not think my view of life, relationships and Jesus would change this much if God did not give you to me.  You are my biggest life changer and miracle, anak.  Because of you, I have learned the meaning of joyful sacrifice and happy tears. Salamat!


Every night, I would pray that I would be the best mom for you, but every day I would also fail.  With that I am sorry. I will never be a perfect mommy, but I am trying hard.... Please put your eyes on Jesus and not on me.  Mom will disappoint, hurt and make you feel bad (not intentional of course) but your Maker will always know what is the bestest for you.  I pray that God will be with me (us, together with your Dad) when I wake up and watch you, and please, also ask Him to watch you as you grow up.  He is the only one who we can all trust.  Ok, babe?

For now, we will bake, play with water, build blocks, make mess, sing Beatles songs, bike and watch Peppa Pig (one hour a day only, okay?).  I will also make sure your tongue is trained for dishes around the world.  So far, I am really proud because you like Mustard, a tiny spread of Wasabi, veggies and fish.  Yipee.





Happy birthday, Risen our boy!! I love you.  Pa kiss sa kili kili! mwahhhh!!!!

PS.


Let this be our birthday gift to you.  Mommy had her passport at 25 so you are considered cool to have it at 2.  We do not know where we will go yet, Mommy has to do Accounting 101 pa, but, I want you to know Mom and Dad desires to go places with you.  Not as fancy as Disneyland, nor smelly zoos where animals are sadly caged, but in towns where we can sleep in tents, look at the stars, play in muddy puddles (just like Peppa pig) and maybe even swim with lots of fishies!!  We pray that God will allow us to take you to lovely places, honey!! Pray with us, okay? :)


Mommyhood Gets "Easier"

For the first time last week, I was able to cook while Risen busily played in our sala.  We have come to the stage that I can leave him "alone" for some time.  Also, my little buddy has been bottle-free for a month now.  He drinks his milk using straw.  This means that when we are out, I just need to bring fresh milk and we are good to go!


Risen proud of what we built


I can go on and on with Risen's milestones, however, alongside these "achievements", I want to highlight that mommyhood gets easier with time.  Age permits out little ones to be slowly independent and though this may be a little sentimental, I am glad to see Risen do his thing.

Really moms,  it gets easier.

Some of you may feel that you will be hostaged for life, but with the right mindset, let me say again that it will be lighter in the coming months.  Hang in there and enjoy smelling your baby's armpits while you still can!

May you enjoy this season of your life, mommies!



MY TODDLER vs MY PRIDE

Risen's routine before bedtime consists of drinking milk, prayer and cuddle time. Last night, after  emptying his bottle, he playfully threw it on my face.  It hit my cheekbone so my reaction was a very loud "arrrayyyy".  Risen and Bryan were shocked.  After 3-5 seconds Bryan asked how I was but Risen stayed silent (probably really surprised by my reaction).

I turned my back on them.  I was really hurt (and pissed).  

Bry quietly talked to Risen.  He said that what he did was wrong and that he should say sorry to me. This Daddy-son talk lasted for a minute.  After that, I felt a tiny hand on my shoulder and the word "o-ni" (sorry).  I still did not face him, up until Bryan said "Mommy, si Risen ...".  

I wanted to stay angry because it really hurts. Second, I wanted to prove my point by staying mad --this would surely make Risen feel that what he did was wrong.  However, I knew in my heart that if I brush off Risen's hand and ignore his apologies he will think that this is the right thing to do. Risen will think that the best response to "sorry" is silence or a mad face.   Would I really want this?
Without thinking, I looked at Risen straight to the eye, smiled and hugged him tight.  It was a good feeling to forgive Risen and let go of my pride.  I (and my cheek) felt better :) 

I have to admit that this is not my usual response when Bryan and I fight.  I stay silent and fight him the longest.  I like proving my point by staying mad. I am not proud of my attitude.  I know this is not ideal.    I am just blessed to  have a husband who reminds me that I am not only sinning against him (wives, respect your husbands) but against God. 


When pride comes, then comes disgrace, 
but with humility comes wisdom. 
Proverbs 11:2

I am thankful that God corrected me once again through Risen.  As a parent, I do not want Risen to lenghten his rage when I have to discipline him.  In order for this happen, I have to set an example.  I have to make sure that I will be ready to hug him after he says "sorry", that I can explain calmly why I got angry and patienly listen to his reply.  I have to be ready for this because I know that there will also come the time when he can "predict" that I am silently fighting with Bryan.  Risen needs to see that forgiveness is prioritized in our home.


Be angry and do not sin; 
do not let the sun go down on your anger, 
and give no opportunity to the devil. 
Ephesians 4:26

This desire would be impossible without His grace. My prayer is that I will choose to always value my relationship with my husband, son, family and friends by not allowing my emotions to rule over my action.  His name be praised!


10 LITTLE THINGS I KNOW ABOUT HOMESCHOOLING

1.  It does not have to be forever.  A child can always go back to normal school.

2.  It is not only for celebrities.

3.  Homeschooling makes kids learn on their own style.

4.  One of the big targets of homeschooling is values education.

5.  The kids may be ready for homeschooling but the parents may be not.

6.  Most parents homeschool their kids because they believe that this is the best time to influence, teach and guide them.

7.  Homeschooled kids have social life!  They have intentional playdates, group homeschooling, etc.

8.  Kids who study at home can travel often, dig dipper on the topics they are very much interested with, and ask as many questions.

9.  Homeschooling may not be necessarily cheap.

10.  One parent has to sacrifice work (one income that is) to supervise his son's progress.


THE FIRST STEP TO DISCIPLINING KIDS

Having Risen means we are in-charge of a life.  We are responsible for someone 24/7.  We are given a chance to raise up a boy whose character and personality are still developing.  In all of this, the word discipline is highlighted.  However, how do we begin? When? Where?


image from http://www.sarahdoody.com/


I believe that the first step to raising kids is to agree with your spouse the form of discipline to use. As a teacher, I have learned that the twin of the word discipline is consistency  It could not be a "yes" today then a "no" tomorrow or a "yes" from the mom and a "no" from the Dad.  It has to be fixed.  It has to be consistent.  It has to be the same.  The husband and wife have a agree.

So talk about it and discuss what discipline method to use. If you can't completely decide on somthing specific, compromise.  Meet halfway.

Parenting is difficult and it is more challenging if the mom and dad are not one in raising their kids. Trust me, you would not want to confuse your children so I am sure you can agree on something!

Tough Love On Risen: Part 2

Here, I ranted on how we needed to break Risen's habit of wanting to sleep in our bed all the time. As promised, now, I will let you know how he responded.

Ate Dot, one of the seasoned moms I know told us to simply talk to Risen.  She also suggested to place a pillow or a blanket in his crib so Risen can associate this to his sleeping place.

So, on a Friday night, I said this (I also did a lot of hand gestures) to Risen before putting him to sleep. Just pardon the choppy English.  I just use the essential or content words so my toddler would understand.

"Risen, mommy and daddy bed.  
Risen crib. Risen, embrace Mickey Mouse.  
Risen, crib.  Risen sleep Mickey Mouse.  
Risen sleep crib. 
 Risen embrace Mickey Mouse."

I remember doing this for 3 minutes.  I did this while he was on my lap so my eyes could meet his.

After this, we prayed and hugged then I placed him in his crib.

And you know what happened? No fuss, no crying!  He stayed in his sleeping place. He slept on his own and did not wake up in the middle of the night!  I know, amazing, right?!



So, ladies and gentlemen, do not underestimate a 15 month old toddler!! They can already understand! :)

Watch out, Mommies!

No stay-at-home mother can claim that she is the best mom just because she is with her child 24/7.  Though I have been only a mother for almost 19 months now, I have seen the “dangers” of being a mom who is always at home.  I think a stay-at-home mother is more prone to be a negligent mom.

Why?  Here are my reasons:

     Because she has nothing else to do. No matter how old the child is, rearing a son or daughter can be draining most  of the time especially if this is your “only responsibility”.  It can be exhausting, boring, demanding and difficult in a lot of areas.  A full time mom may have the tendency to be fed up and extremely impatient with his kids.

      Because she feels unfulfilled.  Some mothers who suddenly gave up their awesome careers to be a stay-home-mom may sense dullness with her new “job”.  Being in the four corners of the house is not a glamorous job.  If you are a new mom, you’d probably smell like sour milk, walk around without any brassier (because you are breastfeeding), bathe fast and totally lose control of your routine.  There is a big leaning to miss your career life and hope that things could easily go back to “normal”.  With this, she may miss the joy of being a mother because she misses a lot of other things.

      Because she thinks she is “always” with her kids. We have a helper at home who also assists me with my son.  I think this is a good idea but I always try to see to it that I am still hands on to Risen.  When you have extra help, it is very easy to delegate and do something else.  This is still a usual struggle for me.  So what I do is set specific times wherein I am in-charge.  Like the feeding, bathing, reading, putting to sleep and others. When I work online, I also see to it I can see him with our house help.


    Being a full time mother is probably the one of the wisest decision I have made but that does not make me a hero.  I may be 24-7 physically present but I can still be emotionally away from my child.  Impatience, boredom, stress, and tiredness might eat me up.  So the key here is balance.  Do something on the side.  Do little things that make you alive.  Go out once in a while.  Exchange stories with other mothers.  Breathe.    Lastly, make sure you are giddy and joyful with your kids.  At the end of the day they do not want a mom-zilla.  So, mommies just like me, watch out!!