CONFESSION: I Am A Stay-At-Home-Mom Who Cannot Stay At Home

It has been known (well at least to the people I have been years back) that I love to pack, live and go somewhere.  I have grabbed a lot of piso and non-piso flights to have a tan.  I saw myself travelling alone with my handy and trusted Jansport and Teva sandals.  If not in a province, I would be in malls, meeting friends or just really, somewhere not home.

This "lifestyle" was altered when I gave birth to Risen.  

I do not regret being with Risen 24/7 but I just have to be honest, that each and every day, I would think of a place where I could go (with Risen of course).  Either to the grocery, or to the mall, or to a coffee shop – basta aalis ako.  Every morning, there is this longing to dress-up and go somewhere.

(PS. I do not leave naman the house every day)

I was further tested when our Ate Marjorie (our help/angel at home) left for a 7 day vacation.  The first day (yes, first day!) made me want to shout.  The fact that I was left alone with Risen, no one to speak with (Bryan had to do study) for a day, made me a little bit very frustrated.  There was like a hole in my being.  I felt verrryyyy bored!!

I am a stay-at-home-mom, so, why can't I be very happy at home, alone with my son?.

That same evening, I mentioned this to Bryan.  I told him, maloloka ata ako ng walang kausap, kasama at ka-share sa pag-tingin kay Risen.  Hindi ko kaya.  It is not the chores nor the taking care of Risen part but the I have no one to talk to issue!  With this confession, we agreed to drive to Mama's house the next morning while Bryan stay in Manila to read.  I felt VERY relieved.

To date, I still struggle to just stay at home.  I wonder how the "real stay-at-home-mom" does it.  Especially with one who does not have help at home.  How do you deal with the no talking part?  The eating alone? The "it is just me and my baby"? How?

I really can't and I feel very bad about it.






What did I do while waiting for God's best?


In my Mid -twenties, I already wanted to have a boyfriend.  There was a longing (and pressure) already.  Medyo naiinip na ko.  
So at 25, I did not wait anymore.  I hurried love.  I dove into an empty pool with closed eyes and tied hands and feet.

Do not do what I did.


Do not trade your life with temporary pleasures and love that you know from the very beginning is not from God. Do not exchange good for best.  Do not ARGUE.  Do not defend that he or she is kind, attends church, willing to "change religion soon", etc.  Hay naku promise, it is not worth it!!

I learned it the hard way and the spanking God gave me was hard - really hard.  Too hard that I found myself on the floor, literally asking for my life back.

Still waiting? Then just wait.  That is easier compared to being with someone who is not from God.

If I could just whack some of the girls I know who decided to follow their heart and not God.... I will, but I cannot.  So let me just say it, straight to the point.

Wag ng ipilit. Do not trade God's perfect timing to your temporary happiness.  Marriage won't be blissful if you marry a man who is not from God.  Sayang ang paghihintay kung sa maling tao ka din mapupunta.

So again, chill lang.  Hurrying love is like telling God you do not trust His timing and provision.



Do not trade a buffet with a bowl of soup.

PS.
Of course this story was before I met Bryan.  My husband was one of God's blessings when I completely yielded to God's will... :) 


**inspired by Pastor Tan-Chi


Veggie Tales Encounter

I have been praying for something very close to my heart for the longest time (even before I got married). And recently, instead of trust, I have been feeling fear towards this ordeal. Sadly, because I think it is too big to ask, I have been forgetting to pray in faith.  

However, alongside with my Bible reading, God spoke to me through a song from Veggie Tales that I introduced to Risen recently. Little did I know that this would be the Lord's reminder for me today.


God is Bigger that the Boogie Man

You were lying in your bed

You were feeling kind of sleepy
You just could not close your eyes
Because the room was getting creepy

Were those eyeballs in the closet?
Was that Godzilla in the hall?
Was there something big and hairy
Casting shadows on the wall

Now your skin is getting clammy
There's a hundred tiny monsters
Jumping right inside your jammies

God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's watching, watching, watching
Watching out for you and me

So, when I'm lying in my bed
And the furniture starts creeping
I'll just laugh and say, "Hey, cut that out!"
And get back to my sleeping

'Cause I know that God's the biggest
And He's watching all the while
So, when I get scared I'll think of Him
And close my eyes and smile!

God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's watching, watching, watching
Watching out for you and me

Come on, come on, come on
In bed
I know, I know, I know
I'm not scared

Come on, come on, come on
Because
I know, I know, I know
God's there
Watching out for you and me

Now instead of getting clammy
You just trust that God is gonna
Give that Boogie Man a whammy

God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's watching, watching, watching

God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's bigger than Godzilla or the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger, bigger than the Boogie Man
He's watching, watching, watching
Watching out for you and me

Watching, watching, watching
Watching out for you and me



Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/veggie-tales/bigger-than-the-boogie-man-lyrics/#QEXL715YPbh5uxXB.99 

Motherhood: On Being Pregnant with Risen

Risen was a honeymoon baby.  I can still vividly remember our conversation with our OB.

OB:  Congratulations! You are 6 weeks pregnant.
Mico and Bryan:  **Gives a very meaningful stare to each other**
Mico to OB: MMMMmmmmmm....Doc... pano po mangyayari yun? 4 weeks pa lang po kaming kasal.
OB:  Haha ganun talaga counting nun.  The count is from the last day of your last menstruation.  O, wag kayong mag-away ah...The count does not begin on your contact but on your menstrual cycle...
Mico and Bryan:  aaahhhh....ganun pala yun..

That talk was really awkward yet very informative.

Actually, even before we had a pregnancy test, Bryan was already convinced I was pregnant.  I, on the other side, was not.  This was because an OB in the past told me that the different position of my uterus will make it very hard for me to be pregnant.  With this, I leaned on the idea of having a childless marriage.

The famous "What if we do not get pregant?"  was one of the questions we sincerely
 talked about during our engagement.  However, obviously, God has a better plan.


During the very moment that we were waiting for a line or lines to appear in a USB liked shaped pregnancy test kit, I busily threw away the packaging and cleaned up the little mess I made in the restroom.  I was not really interested because I was positive that it would be negative.  On the other hand, Bryan, stared at the kit without blinking.  When the two lines appeared, my first reaction was "Hala, bakit dalawa?"  Bryan was like "Oo nga, dalawa"...Then the lines "Buntis ako, just came out of my mouth as I also teared-up".  Bryan just hugged me while my two hands remained stiffly on my side.  I was in complete disbelief.  I was not sad, nor happy, nor excited nor surprised.  I was just like..."what did just happen?  There is a baby inside me...."

I remember spending the rest of the day in bed.  I was still in awe and I did not know how to react.  I also remember demanding from Bryan that we see an OB asap to confirm my pregnancy.  I told him I would only be convinced with this, but after the check-up, I told him I still I need to have an ultra sound because, again, I need another "yes".  After three the yes-es (kit, OB, ultrasound), finally, I gave in.  We started telling our parents and announcing to closest friends.  That was the only time it sunk to my heart and head.  May reaction na ko!! hahaha

Then during our celebration, the Lord reminded me of His sovereignty.  



Truly, doctors are knowledgeable but God is the creator of them all, therefore,
 He has still the last say.  










SELF WORTH vs. NET WORTH

"Our self worth is not determined by our net worth"


This thought pierced my heart.  It was a beautiful and timely reminder that I should continually seek for what is eternal than on what moths can destroy on earth. 

Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.  (Matthew 6:19-21)


Do not get me wrong, I still want those pretty things (I would be happy to get  a new pair of shoes today) but in my motherhood, God taught me contentment -- to not base my happiness on worldly possessions, to not be controlled by the things I cannot buy, to not be driven by money and to not be jealous with the people who appear (as seen on Instagram) to have the every new thing.

I hope to make more memories with my family.  To cultivate friendships and relationships.  To feast over stories and experiences.  To help people. To be kind. To do ministry.  

And with my posts, I hope to click and share and not click and brag, because truly, what can I boast about?



This is what the LORD says: 
"Let not the wise boast of their wisdom 
or the strong boast of their strength 
or the rich boast of their riches. 
Jeremiah 9:23




Lord,
Thank you for what I have and I do not have.  I am thankful for the things I have now and for the dreams and desires You placed in my heart which I know will all happen in Your time. For now, I will wait.  And as I wait, I pray that You will continue to keep me contented.  That I will not be driven by money, possessions and status symbol.  Thank you for allowing me drop a lot of earthly things to prove that You indeed is my all.  With You, I am complete.  Amen



Motherhood: On Being a Stay-At-Home-Mom

I have been fantasizing of being a stay-at-home-mom long before I met Bryan.  I was convinced that this would be my way of raising my children.  However, when I was already in the reality of saying goodbye to my so called career, it dawned on me that it was a difficult choice. Hindi pala madali to let go of a life that you have been into for the longest time.  I had my own set of doubts.   And we, as a couple, had questions, issues and concerns to face.  But since we were both certain that this is what God wants for our little family (we respect those moms who chooses/needs to work), we pushed through with it.

Our first “worry” was money.  Being a full time mom would make us rely on Bryan’s paycheck (who is on study leave now).  With a growing baby to provide for, a house and car to maintain and tummies to feed, this was a big dilemma. We had to compute, re-compute, add, deduct, etc and figure out how we will “live”.  This was very humbling because we were both financially very capable before we got married, and now, we have to suddenly cut on our spending.  Amidst of all the questions on how we will survive, we are comforted that where God leads, He provides.  We never ran out of bills to pay and needs to buy, but up until now, I do not know how God makes it work for us.  He is really our Jehovah Jireh.  He provides!

https://images-blogger-opensocial.googleusercontent.com/gadgets/proxy?url=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F-BRFjuO8Fesw%2FU8-aLhSF0zI%2FAAAAAAAAA0Q%2FNvuWk5CD5Vg%2Fs1600%2Fdownload.jpg&container=blogger&gadget=a&rewriteMime=image%2F*

To add, being a stay-at-home-mom equals to house-arrest.  Did I tell you I cannot literally stay at home? I have to leave the house every single day.  I am allergic to staying at home 24hours.  This will make me insane!  However, Risen came and he taught me I can.  Kaya naman pala.  Although I must admit that the first two months was the hardest.  I would often secretly cry and ask myself “ito na lang ba talaga buhay ko ngayon? Breastfeed, burp, play with baby, put him to sleep?”  But, it got easier!  On Risen’s third month, chores became manageable, I was able to go out again, meet friends, fix myself and spend time with Bryan.  My life became active and I felt normal again.  Today, I just need to go out at least once a week (church not counted).  Ok na ko with this. hihihi

Third, when we decided that I would be staying at home, I had to force myself to be productive.  We both knew it cannot be always about Risen.  For sanity purposes, I had to do something on the side. And once again, God surprised us with a few writing and online teaching rakets I was able to get.  This did not only add  a few cash on our savings but also gave me contentment. The joy of being able to work and see Risen across the table is something I would not trade for anything.   I am getting paid to watch Risen grow. Ang galing!


Amazing, amazing God!  He truly gives our heart’s desire if we rely on his will and put our faith and trust in Him.   Each day is still a learning process for me (and Bryan) but I am grateful for the chance to raise a boy.  Being a stay-at-home-mom is never easy, but with God’s grace, I count it all joy. 


MOTHERHOOD: On What Changed In Me

Mama has been a stay-at-home mother for me and Kai.  She never worked nor did business.  Me and Kai were her daily tasks.  With this upbringing, at an early age, I was convinced that one day I would like to be one too.

Now that I am living the life of Mom who is always at home, I witnessed how my life drastically and beautifully change.  Yes, my status, routine, schedule, priorities were all altered but aside from all of these, there is something inside me that was transformed.  I thought I was already the person I want to be when I got to my late twenties, obviously, I was incorrect. Motherhood (even without my "permission") impacted my life so much that I felt I became a new person.

I did not realize what responsibility meant up until a life was given to me (us). Holding Risen for the first time, and seeing how tiny, soft, and vulnerable he was, was insanely unimaginable.  He has life and his breathing, eating, comfort, and happiness  purely depends on me (us).  I (we) am literally his life.  If I do anything stupid or clumsy, I may lose him.  The moment I became pregnant, a life depends on me.  A life purely depends on me.

I also thought that all the short term missions and community immersions I did made me experience sacrifice.  However, as you have guessed, I was wrong again.  Those things were only 10 percent of what sacrifice  really is. This page will not be enough of the things I had to painfully let go to make sure Risen has a sane Mom at home. I do not regret this (and a lot of Moms told me I never will) but I have to be honest that sometimes, I miss a lot of things.  I miss being spontaneous, teaching inside the classroom, not thinking of anything, sleeping the whole day, working and leaving work to meet up with friends, and a whole lot more.  One may think these are just little circumstances, but when you are tied up with responsibilities you plainly cannot leave at all cost, these little cups of happiness become a humongous platter.

Lastly, I did not realize how self-centered and selfish I was when I was still single. I only thought of myself, my joys, and what I want.  This character made me hurt my parents because I only see myself in every situation.  What I need, What I want, What I am suppose to have. Risen taught me to slowly let go of this.  The unconditional love of my parents and the stubborn grace of God make me tear up and sorry how selfish I was in the past. Ang sama sama ko palang bata noon :(.... Although this attitude still surfaces at times, I am humbled on how my situation brings me back to where I should be.

I am only on my first year of being a stay-at-home mom, a God's work in progress and I know bigger things are ahead of me. However, it is nice to reflect on what August 13, 2013 did to me.  Risen was born on that day and little did I know that a new Mico will be born as well.


God,
Thank you for the wonderful gift of motherhood.  I felt your love and discipline through it.  You really know what to do with life!  Maraming Salamat.

and to Bryan and Risen,

Thank you for making me a mother.  You two changed me for the better.  I love you both.  


Mommy Mico 





WHAT ONE YEAR AND A FEW MONTHS OF BEING MARRIED TAUGHT ME



Being married for one year and a few months taught me that...



1.  Sense of humor can save couples from numerous and unwanted fights.



2. Cheesy date nights (or breakfasts) are happiness. We do our best to make time for it.



3.  Kissing when saying "goodbye" and "welcome home" must not be automatic. It should be done with intent. Make sure eyes meet ;) 


4.  Children should not be the center of the home/world. I think marriage and each other should still be the priority. Happy parents make happy children.





5. Cribs are helpful. At the end of the day, it is still nice to cuddle (since day 1, Risen sleeps in his crib) 













6.  Cooked food is a MUST. I make sure a meal is ready when Bryan comes home (kahit pa sabihin nya na he is busog and won't eat when he arrives home)


 
7.  Praying and having devotions together helps a lot.















8.  A kasambahay could be a blessing. If you have a "good" one, it can save you from stress, problems and quarrels

PS. We are very happy with our ate Marjorie









9.  Knowing Bryan's love language makes me know how to love him (Of course he knows mine too). 





10.  Texts, surprise love notes and pasalubongs are kilig. 

11.  A husband (or a wife) could make or break a marriage.  Do not hurry love, do not settle for good.  Seek for the "best" that God has prepared for you! 

12 TIPS (na naging 21 kasi ang dami pala) FOR A HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATE:

 Welcome to College!  The world of many possibilities, circumstances and relationships. I hope that the list below will enlighten you. This is coming from used-to-be college instructor and an older sister to a college freshman.

1.  KEEP RIGHT - Oh please! When using the stairs, walking along the hallways and entering the door, be sure to keep right! At wag din makipagharutan while walking, ok?! Irita.com ito!!!

2.  SHOW A PLEASANT FACE - Smile (and maybe greet anyone) whoever meets your eyes. Who knows? He could be SOMEONE e.g Registrar, teacher, school president, librarian. Sad to say, a lot of people from big schools do not give second chances. If they find you annoying, you will forever be.

3. LOVE THE MANONG GUARDS,  MANANG CANTEEN AND ATE TAGA LINIS - These people are your must haves in universties. Make friends with them. Be sure to do this sincerely.

4.  ACTIVELY PARTICIPATE IN AN ORGANIZATION - Develop your leadership and servanthood skills (mahirap mag maganda sa classroom, matatawag ka na epal, sa organization pwede ka magpakabibo) . Meet older students. Learn outside the classroom. Attend meetings. Be responsible to something. 

5. SIT IN FRONT - Not all teachers can memorize their students names. Make sure to be positively familiar to your professors. Iba ang pakiramdam ng kilala ng Professor. You get to relax a little.

6.  CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS - You do not need a barkada in the beginning of the school month. Observe first. Choose them wisely. The personality, character and hobbies of your friends can affect you, your upbringing and your college life. Ingat! BAD COMPANY CORRUPTS GOOD CHARACTER.

7. YOSI, BEER, BF/GF, SEX and FRAT - In college, these would appear common. It would seem everyone is doing it except for you. Most of these are tried in college. Your barkada will probably do it. WAG NG SIMULAN!! Stay away from it.

8.  BE PUNCTUAL - college is a preparation to the workforce.  If you develop the attitude of being late in attending class, late in submitting papers, late in going to mtgs or seminars, most likely, you will bring this all your life. Go to school early. Masarap maging maaga sa classroom.  Ang hirap nung pawis na pawis at hinihingal kang aakyat ng bldg. Toxic yun! 

9.  READ - Read homeworks before you pass them. Do not just google, copy, paste, print and pass. Susko, when I was a teacher, merong magpapasa ng may hyperlink pa! Gggggrrrrr!!!!
Read bulletin board announcements, maki tsismis sa school newspaper, feed your mind with novels. Instead na tumulala ka sa bus, READ! 

10.  SAY "EXCUSE ME", "THANK YOU", AND "SORRY"- This is not only for your teachers but also for your classmates, schoolmates and ates and kuyas in the university 

11.  DO NOT MEET UP WITH A PROFESSOR/GO TO THE FACULTY ROOM ALONE - For safety reasons, always have a buddy. Do not visit teachers alone. If they insist, go to the Dean.

12.  HAVE A TRUSTED PERSON - Find a "nanay" in the campus. You could always find a mentor. This could be your old professor, organization adviser, guidance counselor. When problems happen, go to them.  

 13.  HAVE SPARE COINS - You need this for photocopy, photocopy and photocopy 

14. HIDE MONEY, GADGETS, CELLPHONE - Maraming magnanakaw sa classroom, school at bus. Another thing, when using earphones, make sure not to insert plugs in both ears. Baka masasagasaan ka na, hindi mo pa alam! 

15.  BRING YOUR ID - If you forget, admit it. Don't you dare borrow from classmates. 

16. HOLD ON TO YOUR FAITH AND VALUES - You will enjoy college more if you do the right things. Clean fun and jologs adventures are better than the ones that would ruin you. 

17. FOCUS ON YOUR STUDIES- why are you in  the school? To STUDY - Opportunities will come in different directions. Do not spread yourself to thin. What you do now will land on your resume. Get good grades because this will be your armor when you get a job.  Again... Why are you in school? Para mag-aral diba? This could be the last 4 years of your academic life. Make the most of it. 

18.  LEARN ON YOUR OWN -  Do not expect your teacher to tell you everything.  College ka na. When you do not know, ask and read.

19.  DO NOT BE ABSENT - Hindi na uso excuse letter. Be responsible of what you will miss. Goodbye special exams, quizzes and projects. 

20.  FOCUS ON YOUR LONG TERM GOALS -  Avoid "trying things" unless you see yourself doing it for a long time.  Do not join a club just to see how it feels like.  Join and be committed to things that you see yourself doing even after college.  Sayang ang time and effort to things that won't really help you at the end.  I mean, why will you join the Taekwondo Team if you really want to swim?  And oh, you don't have to do what your barkada is doing.  In college, it is okay/normal to have your own mind.

21.  SHINE FOR GOD- Let your light shine before God. Follow rules. Do not lie. Do not cut classes just because. Do your best. Be a testimomy.

All in all, college is a jungle. Be with the crowd who will not feed you to the lions. 
At the end of the day, these people will not help you pass your subjects, assist you to get a degree, mentor you to land a job and make you succesful. It will be you.  Have fun you guys! :)

Paoay Summer Vacation 2014

Since college, I have never been a fan of 3 day trips.  I seldom stay in a new place for 2 nights, instead I always make sure to stay longer to really get to know the place, taste the local food and speak with the community.  This is so true for trips that require planes.  The first time I went to Boracay (2004), I was there for 2 long weeks.  Feeling ko kasi, pagod lang ang three day trips.  It will never be relaxing.  It will never be enough.

That is why, I am so grateful for our 3 week stay here in Paoay.  It was such a refreshing and fulfilling vacation.  We got to spend time (especially Risen) with Mommy and Daddy and got to reconnect with relatives, church mates and a few neighbors.  The abundance of local food also satisfied me, I mean us. :) Naimas (delicious) and veggies dito! Always organic and fresh from the farm.  I don't think I can ever find such greens in the Metro!  Oh plus the Tupig, Bagnet, Empanada, dudol (like Maja Blanca), Carrot cake of La Preciosa , and Daddy's Dinuguan and Igado! YUM!!

I also found God here.  He confirmed some things we have been asking for.  He also provided and made a lot of things more beautiful for us.  Though I was not able to understand the preachings in Bry's home church (mostly Ilokano), my spirit was silenced and comforted with the hymns and classic Christian songs we sung.  It feels so refreshing to worship God with old and slow songs with just a piano accompanying it.  I will surely miss this!

Father,

Thank you for Paoay. Thank you for remembering my prayer in high school when I wished to have a province hours away from Manila.  Naalala mo po talaga!  Thank you for the beach that Risen got to experience and I got to swim in .  Thank you for family who have done all good things for us!  Thank you for the rest and change of environment.  Thank you because You have blessed me with in-laws that I will always look forward of visiting.  Thank you for the fun, kwentos, fresh air, and love!  God, You always amazes me!  I will  forever be grateful! <3 span="">



M&S: Matt and Sarah's Wedding

My high school and school bus friend got married yesterday!! This was not only special because I knew Matt since I was 14 but also coz Sarah, his wife by now, became my friend when they got together. In our "circle", we are all married na! Meaning, no one will get left behind when we start talking about SPG stories!! haha I hosted the event together with Krystal, my emcee partner in ICA for 5 years --- na miss ko to!!! So happy pa that I got to fix myself, wear heels and be on a date with my hawt husband!





Since I was an emcee nga, our calltime was at 1pm. This was a bonus coz I had a chance to peep in the venue. Here take a peek too.

  




Love love love the details and the one million origamis! Yes, exagg but ang dami kasi talaga nila ;)

One thing that I look forward in weddings are the marches of the groom and bride. Matt and Sarah's walks were opposites. In the mid of his march, Matt raised his two hands and shouted "wuhoo", while Sarah was quiet. And according to Bry, who was one of the hawi boys ng curtain , ang lalim daw ng hinga ni Sarah.... ;)




My next fave part! The vows...I managed to type some excerpt. Here it goes.

MATT: He has favored and bless me with you...then he sang a few lines from ikaw.. clap to Matt na ndi nasintunado!!! 

sarah: ...God's plan is good and that plan includes you. Thank you for being all that you are. I commit to love you unconditionally and submit to your headship

Yehey for personally written vows :)

The wedding of Matt and Sarah is the smallest I have attended to. They have 65 guests, and you know what? It was lovely:) Twas so intimate that we had the chance to have a group pic -- all the 65 of us!

After the ceremony, the programme was filled with songs and dances. Sarah's dad  and Sarah danced slow then goofed to a cha-cha song c/o eat bulaga/rizza mae. Speeches were made next. I love Drew's speech to his brother! He was like "....akala ko saging lang ang may puso, si kuya pala may puso din" hahahaha 

Haaaay!! Matt and Sarah, congrats again. Welcome to the blissfull and crazy wagon of marriage! Dinner soonest :)


PS.
musta first night? lol

FOUR Rs: A Guide to Choosing the "Right" Person

Last Febuary 14, 2014, we got up at 6am and headed to Cafe Breton for a hearty breakfast.  After this, I had my mani and pedi and Bryan had his haircut.  Though this was already a great way to spend Feb 14, we knew something bigger will happen.  That night, we had a chance to share how God moved in our lives through our love story.  A perfect time to share how God authored us.  And since we outlined our testimony, I decided to turn it into a blog. Read on.

**These thoughts and beliefs are in the context of being a born-again christian.  Examples used were also intended for HS and college students.

RIGHT MOTIVE

·         Ready to get married
·         Are you courting her because you need a gf? To show that you have a gf?
·         Have you ever prayed for it?
·         Did you ever pray for a lifetime partner even before you met her?
·         Did you ever ask God to direct you – as to whom to court. 
    
       If your reasons are because you feel lonely and incomplete, bala wala ng dumating, crush ko sya, magulo sa bahay ng parents ko, and kinikilig ako pag kasama ko sya, you might need to think things over.

RIGHT PLACE

·         any place is appropriate as long as the intention is not to hide.  In short, kahit saan basta hindi patago.

RIGHT TIME

·         Ready to make Mico my next priority after God.  After God, si Mico na.  Not my studies,       not my work, not my parents.

·         Assessed myself first
-          Ability to lead
-          Ability to support/sustain a family (has savings, stable income)
-          Ability to make firm decisions
-          Ability to be responsible for someone/family

·         Can fulfill ….
-          God’s plan for married people
-          words, dreams and promises into reality and actions.  It was NOT, balang araw papakasalan kita.  It was more of, liligawan kita kasi kaya at gusto na na kitang pakasalan.

·         You know it is the right time when you do not have to ask if it is the right time

·         Supported by family, friends and churchmates

      We both do not have issues (of the past and present). We are not moving on, kaka break lang, incomplete.

RIGHT PERSON – How did I know it was Bryan?

·         Got to know myself first
-          Comes with age and experience
·         Aware and firm with my non-negotiables
a.    Matured Christian
b.    Not an OFW - because I am not good with long distance relationship
c.    Will move out from his parents
d.    Not a Pastor - because I know I do not want and could not be a Pastor's wife
e.    Ready to get married
f.     Out-going

·         Ready for a clear and announced status
-          NOT “it is complicated”
-          NOT “special friends”
-          NOT “friends pero may kilig at malisya”
-          NOT “mutual understanding”
-          NOT “dedma sa personal pero super close sa FB, Instagram at Twitter”
-          NOT “kuya or ate”
-           
…status should be
-          Nanliligaw sya at nagpapaligaw ako
-          Bf ko sya, gf nya ako
-          Engaged
-          Considering each other for marriage

·         I knew it was him because I did not have to ask

·         He can make me follow

   KEY VERSES:

1 Corinthians 6:12
Everything is permissible but not everything is necessary
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
 For everything there is a season,
    a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
    A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
    A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
    A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
    A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
    A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
    A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
    A time for war and a time for peace

Genesis 2:23-25
This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
Ephesians 5:33
However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

1 Peter 3:7
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Corinthians 6:12
Do not be deceived:  Bad company corrupts good morals

2 Corinthians 6:14-15
Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?

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