From Being MARRIED To Becoming IT'S COMPLICATED

from love to bleh
from kisses to turned backs
from holding hands to walking apart from each other
from  long sweet talks to silence
from being married to becoming it's complicated






What happened, love birds?


I do not have specific answers but I have a list of the possible things that might be harming your marriage.  These are mostly principles from the Bible and  I chose this to be on top of the list because I believe that God gave very specific instructions for happy and ideal relationships.  I am not an expert myself so I always make sure to go back to His words. Isn't it great that God made sure we have guidelines to help us with our lives?  Yes, even with our marriage!  If we choose to obey them, we will surely have a better life. So if you are a believer of God and His Word, this might be helpful for you and your marriage.

1.  You still live with your parents or in-laws
As the Scriptures say, "A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one." Ephesians 5:31

2.  Husbands, you do not show your love to your wife and wives, you do not show respect to your husband
"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her"Ephesians 5:23-25

3.  You need to forgive
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

4.  You have the wrong set of priorities. 
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.- Matthew 6:33
So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22

5.  Your roles have changed.  The wives have become the leader and the husbands the follower.
"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" - Ephesians 5:23-25

let me also add a thing or two from my observation...

6.  You still have your kid/s in the middle of your bed

7.  There is too  much use of gadget while inside the car, before going to sleep, inside the restaurant, or even during "family time"

8.  You have a long distance relationship

9.  Work or sleep has taken over Sabbath day

As I mentioned earlier, I am not an expert on marriage.  However, we are blessed to have a very supportive D-group and church who counsels and teaches us how to protect our marriages.  In our D-group at CCF Muntinlupa, I and Bryan sit down with other couples where we discuss our issues, blessings and questions on motherhood, fatherhood, work, relationships, or generally, with our married life.  Then in our church, we have topics where we are pointed out to the giver of all things - Jesus!!We also have retreats and other events solely for married couples.  It is good to be surrounded by people who values their marriages. I hope that you will choose to also be with other couples who sees marriage as sacred, pure and God given.

Marriage was created by God and He wants it to always be a "top of the world experience".  It is not His will to be sour and empty.  If you or your marriage needs help and you have questions with the list that I wrote, you can PM me.  Maybe we can discover more what the Bible says on this over a cup of cofee.  My treat, promise!


FINALLY, I DO NOT MIND WAITING

Do you remember the time you had to wait for a long line to end? Then amidst of all the heat, sweaty people, chaos and hunger you suddenly become so thankful because you have a good book in your bag or bumped into a long lost friend? This is the time you find yourself saying "haaay! buti na lang andito ka!!!"

Bryan and I are in the season of waiting.  And, as many would know, it is not easy to wait especially when you already did your best, put out resources and prayed hard.

On the other hand, I am just more than happy that I am waiting with Bryan.  He is like a good book in this long queue of waiting. Though we have been watching the clock lately, we are all good. I am blessed to have a man who does not base his decisions on luck, or on "bahala na", or on pera pera (meaning, maraming pera dito, so dito tayo), or on feelings or on any other attractions given by the world.  My husband is not perfect and will never be but I am overwhelmed because He tries His very best to obey God and the Bible in every decision he /we have to make.

Having a wonderful husband and an awesome God does not make life "problem free", however, it could give you a sense of peace and direction.

We still struggle and sin.  We still become impatient when asked to wait.  Our marriage life is at times messy, however, amidst all this I am beyond thankful because my leader is Bryan whose leader is God.  It may a long line ahead, but really, I won't mind - I have him and we have Jesus.

So single ladies (sorry I did not expect to give an unsolicited advice at the end hehe), pray for a man that can make you stress free and still pretty when you have to wait on long lines.  Problems will come in your marriage and it would be a fine day when you know your husband is or will not be an additional trouble. Pray hard and believe in God's best!





KIDS RALLY AT CCF MUNTINLUPA

Last Saturday we had a Kids Rally from 8am to 3pm.  Our Sunday School children had a day of relay games, Bible quizzes, stories and movie time.  It was a wonderful day to spend time with the kids and and kids at heart.  I actually do not remember the last time I stayed the whole day inside the church, so this day is really special, not to mention that Risen got to participate as well!!  I am just really glad to be back in God's work!  HURRAH!!!!
















Thank you to Tita Diane and Tita Ann for the pictures!! :D

HAPPY TO SERVE (AGAIN)

We are back in the ministy!  Individually, I serve in the Sunday School and Bryan writes for the Chronicle (CCF Muntinlupa Newsletter) and as a couple we help the Singles Ministry. We can say that it feels sooooo good (and right) to be a part of God's vineyard once again.


Bryan and I both grew up in the church.  Every time we talk about our "younger days", we both mention the same key words such as Sunday school, DVBS, choir, outreach, community work, camps, retreats, kid's praise, fund raising and others.  So, when we have more or less "settled our little family", we prayed then volunteered ourselves to help.



We are more than glad to be in the ministry again because aside from the privilege of serving our church and God, this is also a big opportunity to help ourselves, our marriage and Risen.  We are excited for Risen to grow-up in a church and develop lifelong friendship with the other kids (just like what Bryan and I did).  We are also anticipating that as we help the singles and young professionals , this will make our relationship and bond stronger (research says that when a couple pursues a common goal, their relationship is likely to be healthier), and lastly we can't help to learn from our ministry heads and from the people we serve. We know that at the end of the day God will use the time we spend in the church to mold us to be better and more responsible partners, parents and Christians.  This will be a wonderful ride!!!








Three "Ordinary" Things That Your Toddler Does Not Really Need

1.  Sounding Toothbrush - This cute sounding toothbrush is a possible source of fight during wash time.  Since it creates sounds, the tendency is for the toddler to get and play with it.  There goes the wrestling match during bath time between mommy and baby!

2.  Puzzle Mats - Puzzle mats are important!  You can place it in your play areas, rooms and any other places where your toddlers stay.  However, the puzzle mats that contain letters and shapes take time to tidy!  Mommies would usually take time to match the mats with the letters and this is not good during busy days (actually, even on normal days).  So if you want a pack and play kind of mat, choose the biggest sizes without that does not contain letters to match.  I suggest you pick the mat right below.

image from greenmats.com



image from sushisantiago.com

3.  Toys that are not for their age - This one does not really work.  If the toy is for 5 years old and above, a 2 year old will not be able to maximize its usage.  Aside from it may contain small parts that are dangerous to kids, it is not just worth it.  I have seen moms who pushed the idea that their child is "mature" enough to handle the toy.  Unluckily, I have seen the same mothers regret getting the inappropriate toys for their kids.  Let us take it from them and not commit the same mistakes.






The Practical Ways of Staying in Shape

I may not be in the perfect shape, but I think I have done a great job coz I still buy clothes in medium sizes!! Woohoo!!.  Though I have my genes (both Ruiz and Dimanlig have medium built) to thank, I say I still do my part.  If I do not watch my body, there is a very big possibilty that I would not be able to maintain my desired size. Want some help? Here!

1.  Do not buy a bigger size of clothes.  Stay on your size.  Make it fit!

2. You can eat what you want for breakfast.  If you are tempted to eat a lot during late lunch or dinner , freeze it then eat it in the morning! 

3.  Make people accountable.  Annouce that you are on a diet.

4.  If you are in-charge of the grocery shopping, buy healthy food.

5.  Have a cheat day.  It is okay to eat.  But remember, it should only be a cheat day, not a sheat week!!

6.  If possible, arrange dates or eat outs during lunch.  This will still give you time to burn what you munched.

7.  Exercise at least 10 minutes a day.  I know most of you would want to lose weight without sweating but this is kind of impossible especially when you have reached your 30s.  So come on, just do jumping jacks, planks, and sit-ups.