Do you know the next question that comes after "When are you getting married?" it is the "O wala pa ba?" in other words, "Are you already pregnant?"


Whether this is out of concern, closeness or curiosity, one has to careful when inquiring.  This becomes detestable when people ask just because she is craving for green mangoes, in a dress (some would even feel the tummy gggrrrrr), got chubbier or she feels a bit sick.  I mean, buntis agad? Hindi ba pwedeng gutom or mainit lang?

I feel them because twice in my lifetime, Doctors told me I will never get pregnant.  I was so anxious on how I will say this the time Bryan was courting me.  When he told me, it was not an issue, and when during the pre-marital counselling we were able to really settle this, what I feared next was facing the questions of the people around us.  That was why, a tear fell when someone not really close to us asked us if there is already a baby in my tummy.  Mind you, we have only been married for like three weeks and it already shook me inside.

As months went by, and when I became pregnant, I noticed how everyone around me was celebrating.  However, I also noticed the asides (brief comment) of those who congratulated us.  Like "O, naunahan pa kayo nina Mico",  "Kelan naman kayo?", "naku sina Juan, hindi makabuo",  etc.  I feel bad for them because like them, I dreaded those comments.

It is at times hurtful to wait for pregnancy, and this becomes grotesque when people ask and comment as if we "make" them (remember that God is the giver of a child).  So please lang, stop asking and making distasteful reactions.  

What is even worse?  When...

1.  some suggest a position you can try
2.  most brand them kawawa because no one will take good care of them when they are sick and old


To you who intentionally or insensitively ask...

You do not know the struggles that they face each night and in every pregnancy test.  You also do not know how this may be affecting their marriages.  So again, I will ask you, embrace God's time table and let them enjoy the gift of intimacy, which is by the way not only made for pro-creation.  Their womb is different from yours, and just the same, God's plan for their family is far from yours.  Let their wombs be.  

To those who are being bugged.  Hugs.  You are beautiful just the same.  Aren't you glad only God can make us complete?  No amount of children, assets, or even career can make up for that longing - only Jesus! When you have Him, you (and your hubster) will just be fine.

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