Showing posts with label people. Show all posts
Showing posts with label people. Show all posts


I sometimes wish I could let go of people easily. In many times, I find myself chasing people and friendships. I am a people person. I always choose the relationship than whatever is happening between us. Ewan ko ba, but it is just really difficult for me to be distant or make tampo.  I always see myself understanding the person.

The situation I am in is sometimes tiring (some people call it stupid). It is like allowing myself to get hurt over and over again - sometimes by the same people. It also means choosing to fully believe people when they say "sorry", "promise", next time,  etc.

When the image and thought below circulated on the Internet, my mind wanted to repost it, however, I knew that my heart says the opposite.

Let me also recount a quote a week ago which says that a person should not be chasing friends and true love.  I believe this is true, however at the end of the day, I feel like there are some relationships that need chasing and saving.  I do not know about you, but for me, the relationships that I have matters (or maybe some don't) and I just can't let them go down the drain.  Just too difficult.

image not mine
I do not know if this is good or bad.  I sometimes feel gullible and "stupid" for trying to fix things.  I just really pray that this would be used for His glory.  Maybe I should consider it a gift? I do not know.  My heart will just always say that I have patience for you, and you, and you.

Meet Jihan. My College Friend Who Survived Cancer.

I hate Cancer.  I have seen my closest friends cry over their mom's death because of this disease.  When Jihan told me she cancer, I honestly thought I would lose her too.  However, God turned things round and made her Cancer free! Praise God.  Let me share to you this amazingly, beautiful story!!

Jihan is the girl in yellow daster and rollers

How did you find out you had Cancer?
I was experiencing shortness of breathe and I felt lumps on my throath area so I decided to have a consult.  I was working at TELUS when I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma. The Pulmunologist from Makati Med (I forgot his name) told me that the findings says that I have cancer so he referred me to an oncologist in the same hospital.

Jihan is the girl in yellow (yes, yellow again)

How did you deal with the treatment? hospitalization? cancer?
At first I had to do natural healing for about 6 mos. However, the supplements were so expensive that we can't handle the expenses anymore so I had no choice but to undergo Chemotherapy. We opted to have procedures in PGH because it is a lot less expensive compared to other hospitals. And besides we can ask assistance from PCSO and Senators for the laboratory and treatment expenses.

I prayed really hard that I may be able to accept chemotherapy and radiation as my option to be healed. I heard and read a lot of feedback that Chemo targets not only the cancer cells but even the good cells. I was scared to undergo those treatments. That's why I remember begging God to heal me as early as possible with just the natural way in order for me not to experience chemotherapy and radiation, because I was so scared! But I drew strength from Jesus as I read the scriptures how scared Jesus was when He was praying at the Garden of Gethsemane that resulted Him to cry and sweat in blood, but He told God the Father, to let His will be done. And finally, I was able to say it to Him, let His will be done in my life. I told Him that I will embrace Chemotherapy and Radiation as His way of healing me. It takes a lot of prayers from family and friends and myself, a lot of inner healing retreats before I was finally able to say, Lord, let your will be done. I learned to enjoy each step of the way. I enjoyed being in the hospital. It was tough but I enjoyed the place, the fellow patients presence, the life inside the hospital. I just accepted everything. That was how I dealt with it. I dealt with cancer by accepting the fact that I had it and knowing that with God's grace my body will defeat it.

What part of Cancer was the most painful?
The blood extractions were painful because I was kinda bloated so they were having hard time to hit the veins. The blood transfusion was hard too. During my first chemo, they had to transfuse blood because my CBC count was not normal anymore, I am not sure if it was the hemoglobin or the platelet that was low.

There was one chemo drug that, that was painful every time it enters my veins but it was tolerable. One of the hardest part was the grogginess and the tipsiness that I felt after chemo sessions and of course the vomiting episodes...classic un...hahahah...I want to thank our kasambahay, back then,  Nerissa for being on my side that time to help me fall asleep even I was vomiting the whole day and night...hehehe

Did you think you would die during that time?
Of course, it came across my mind that I might die especially during the time that I was rushed to the hospital because I can't breathe. It was Holy Wednesday 0f 2011 when I was rushed to the hospital. That was the time, somehow, even just a bit (compared to Jesus' experience) I felt and experienced the sufferings and pains that Jesus experienced, the one that we usually remember during Holy Week. 

How did you stay cheerful and hopeful?
I stayed cheerful because that has been me. I mean that's my personality. I am cheerful in nature. I always see funny stuff in every perspective even in a very pathetic situation (as others may perceive). I stayed hopeful because I believe GOD LOVES ME. AND I USED THAT LOVE AS MY WEAPON TO BE STRONG AND HOPEFUL. That was the only thing I held in my hand, in my heart, in my mind, and in my soul. 

How did you know you are cancer free?
The CT Scan result in 2013 said that I don't have tumor anymore.

3 things that changed in you:

  • The way I express, understand, and feel LOVE
  • I now always pray not just for myself but I now pray for others especially for the sick. 
  • I now have more FAITH, HOPE, AND LOVE in me. Because I EXPERIENCED GOD! 
What is your advocacy? Organizations that you support?

  • I now organize outreach programs for cancer patients at UP-PGH Cancer Institutesometimes at C.H.I.L.D Haus
  • volunteer catechist
  • church worker in our parish
  • I guess my greatest advocacy is to spread to everyone that God is alive and HE hears our prayers and HE will give, in His time, everything that we ask for.

As of today, she is happily engaged with Albert Magno and works as an Instructor in Southville International School.  She also helps out with their family owned school in Cavite.

Thailand day 1 - at Bangkok

It was still early dawn when we left our home in Manila.  We took a cab to the airport and waited excitedly for our first international flight together.  We have never gone out of the country as one so we felt like kids allowed to  play in the pool all day long.  Our flight to Bangkok was on time and hassle free up until we arrived at the airport and realized that the hotel personnel was not yet there to pick us up.  We bought a simcard and called the hotel to make sure they are waiting for us.  As expected in the busy city of Bangkok, our driver was caught in the traffic, and so we waited for 10 or 15 minutes more.

He finally arrived with the name “Bryan Sodara” on a bond paper and as we sat down in the van, we were nostalgic of our Thailand trips in the past.  We shared stories of food we ate and places we toured, but at the same time, expressed our giddiness for our Thailand experience together.  After 30 or 40 minutes we reached Four Seasons International House which is seated in the busy streets and bazaar of Bangkok.  The hotel was small and ran by a Filipino so my interest of using Thai I learned from my previous trips was not put to use.  We were welcomed with drinks and were helped with our luggage.  Our room was a newly renovated, beyond our expectation yet not so different.   So after a quick picture taking we jumped into to the shower and bed.

When we were back in Manila planning our honeymoon, we made sure that our time of togetherness, will indeed be a time of such.  That is one reason why we visited a city we both have been when we were not yet together –we did not want to be too aggressive in going around the city but rather in just being together. With this, our first day was about room service and rest.  After lounging in the room for some time, we decided to walk to the nearest mall and meet up with a missionary couple for dinner.  Since me and Bry are both in love with travelling and ministry, we made sure we can bless and be blessed with the lives in the city we were visiting.

And so the night was left to explore Bangkok’s street food nearby we can exploit the next day.  We felt like real honeymooners, not minding time, itinerary, curfew and people around us.  We were legit to do whatever whenever. 

And there, our first day happened and lasted with a lot of happy sighs of and smiles.

thank you, BCF-Camella

**Last September 2012, I decided to join the Council meeting of my home church, Camella Bible Centered Fellowship and ask for their blessing to transfer to another church.  Then, on the last week of November of the same year, I shared my testimony and said thank you and “goodbye” to the congregation of BCF.

Below is the letter I read to the leaders of the council.

PS.  They all gave me their blessing.

Good evening everyone.  This is my first time to meet up with the church leaders in a formal meeting so I decided to write everything so as not to forget and or be led with emotions as I say what I came here for.  So, please allow me to read this for you po.

As you all know, I am with Bryan and are now wedding planning.  Since we both grew up in church, we both know how a church can help in the life of a Christian.  I, alone, is a testimony to this.  I started going to Sunday school at 7.  There I met teachers, Mommies, Daddies and friends whom I looked up to and friends up until now.  My confidence was built up in this church too as I joined Kid’s praise, Cantatas and Kid’s choir.  As I grew up, my High school and college life was easier because of cell groups, Tita Gerlyn and my friends who are all struggling to be good teenagers. Sabay sabay kaming lumaki and I am glad we have a church we can go to if we need a home or a safe place.  Praise God for BCF.

Our church did not stop helping me because I know this church prayed for me several times.  You were there for me when I had troubles with my parents, growing up and school.  When I passed my board exam.  When I decided to do things on my way, this church and the people in it did not turn their backs on me but instead loved me and accepted my decisions.  Kahit po mali ako, at maraming beses po yun, never po ako natakot sa church magkwento because I know at the end of the day, I will be loved, prayed for and be comforted.  And for that, I will be forever thankful. 

Now that I am with someone and we are trying to practice togetherness in our relationship, one of the things we both know we need to make a decision to is what church to go to.  Kung si Bryan po ang masusunod, sa Baptist church po kami.  Kung ako naman po, dito po kami sa BCF.  With this 50-50 choices, we have decided to choose a church that we are both okay with.    Si Bryan po ay Fundamental Baptist.  I am not.  Bryan is more comfortable with hymnals and I am more comfortable with praise and worship.  Sanay po si Bryan sa serious and solemn type of service and sanay naman po ako ng relaxed na may halong kakwentuhan pa sa tabi.  Ok po ako sa 8 am service.  Si Bryan po ay naaagahan dito.  Bryan is ok with formal dressing up sa church while ako naman po ay naka formal lang pag anniversary.  Though we are both Christians since our childhood, our church and worship traditions and culture are not the same.  So with this, we decided to go to a church where we are both comfortable with. 

I am here, in front of you to first thank you for all the help, teachings, love, prayers and support.  I consider you as my family.  The closest friends, Titas, and Titos are from this church.  From the bottom of my heart, maraming maraming thank you po.  Another thing I came here for po is to ask for your blessing.  I want to ask for your blessing to allow me to worship God every Sunday in another place.  Please remember that it is only my attendance every Sunday that will falter.  But my love, concern, support and help with this church will not. 

I decided to really seek for your blessing because I feel like I am child moving out of her parents’ house.  It is my prayer that my relationship with the church will not be affected by this change in my life.  Wag din po kayo magalit kay Bryan because he is undergoing this change too J.  Iiwanan nya din po ang simbahan nya.  Titas and Titos, I am not very happy with this decision but I know this is God’s will for us -- to be in a place where we can worship God together comfortably.  Please pray that God will provide this church for us.  We are not yet sure if this church will be in San Andres (where we plan to reside) or here in Alabang.  If you will give me this blessing, I will “officially” transfer by December of this year (after we get married). Kung wala po ako dito sa church, that means po we are church hopping.  Looking for the church that God wants us to be in. 

This is really difficult but again, thank you po and I hope you will give me your blessing as I journey with Bryan in marriage and spiritual adjustments.


1. Marriage is made up of two good forgivers. Because every marriage is made up of two sinners. (Romans 3:23)
2. At some point, you will have to learn that life isn’t all about you. (Philippians 2:3)
3. Don’t listen to women that tell you that passion fades…it doesn’t have to! (um…all of Song of Solomon)
4. Don’t give up. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13)
5. He wants a kind wife, not a maid or another mother. Be nice. (Galatians 5:22-23)
6. Give your husband the gift of your respect.  He needs it more than you know. (Ephesians 5:33)
7. Be mindful of your expectations.
8. Honor the Lord above all things. Colossians 3: 17
9. Find your worth and security in the Lord, and don’t look to your husband to meet all of your needs.
10. Be very careful about reading romance novels, they set you up for an unrealistic view of romance.
11. Real romance is finding that one spot in the crook of his arm to snuggle into, that shared look over the dinner table when the kids are acting crazy, and the way he fixes the leaky sink when he is dog-tired after work.
12. Love is about relationship.  The more I love my husband, and seek a relationship with him, the less critical and duty-bound I become.  It is similar to my relationship with God.
13. Be thankful for the husband you have. Accept him as he is, not for what you want him to be.
14. Don’t compare!! Don’t buy into the game of comparing him with anyone else’s husband.
15.The Biblically “normal” marriage is filled with joy, connection, laughter, and peace.  It’s not free of hurt feelings and conflict, but they know how to process their pain with one another so that they live more often in a meadow than at the scene of a train wreck.  This is not the average marriage, but it normal – -because it is a visible display of Jesus’ relationship with His bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).
16. Your marriage is a testimony! 
17. Pray for your marriage. Pray hard.
18.I’ve heard that is gets better with age.  I have to say in my short {13 year} experience, that is so true.
19. Where there is God, there is always hope. Even for the most broken marriages. “With God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)
20.Marriage is commitment and sacrifice. But it’s also the best, most wild ride you will ever have with your best friend.
Text by Joy Forney of Grace Full Mama.
First seen in patty's blog page


Inay (lola, ma’s side) introduced me to coffee.  During summer, when I was around 4 or 5 years old, I remember slowly going down the stairs and heading directly to the kitchen.   Inay’s kitchen leads to the batalan (an open dirty kitchen) where Ama, is busily sharpening his bolo while cooking coffee and Inay is steaming rice.  While still half awake, I would sit on an overused bangko  (wooden bench) and smell the aroma of the boiling coffee.

Ama, would look at me and ask why I woke up so early.  I would just look at him and half smile (shy and still sleepy).   Inay then will offer coffee straight from the pot.  I blew and gradually sipped until I finish the whole cup. 

Brewed coffee with sugar for a 5 year old on a provincial morning.  Epic.

Who would have told that starting college, this would be a part of my morning routine?  Every morning, I would half awake make myself a cup of coffee (fine, minsan si Mama hahaha).  No pots for me though, just my handy coffee maker.  No matter what my day is like, I need my freshly brewed cup of coffee.

If I do not get coffee, I would get a terrible headache. I don’t know if this is psychological or scientific, but I just really need a fresh cup of it – everyday.  Aside from this, I love the bitter-sweet taste of coffee (no creamer for me).  Just thinking about it, makes me want a cup now. 

In the celebration of this coffee blog, let me share to you my fave QUICK FIX coffee brands.  Meaning, IF I am on the run, any of these coffee names would be my first to get.. :)

6.  KOPICCINO (of Kopiko) - This is my latest 3 in 1 discovery (Thanks to Marian Pasicolan, another 3 in 1 explorer).  Since it is sweet and creamy, I wouldn't have it everyday, but will definitely have it on a rainy, lazy afternoon.  What I LOVE about this 10 peso 3 in 1 sachet is the stash of chocolate powder that you can pour after stirring your cup.  What an instant beauty to your cheap cup of coffee! :)

5.  MCDONALD'S - I still trust Mcdo.  Just make sure the lid is placed properly.  I always lift the lid to make it in won't come off.  Mcdo is extra special because of the convenience they give to drivers. Drive-thru lang, may coffee ka na!  They come in small (29 php) and big sizes and (39 php) .

4.  STARBUCKS - Need I say more?  I usually get Cafe Misto, extra hot, grande.  

3.  DUNKIN DONUTS - I love their coffee!  I rediscovered this cup when I taught in Adamson.  I would leisurely pass by their store before I go to class.  Perfect fix for a start-up! :)  Sold at 35 php.

2.  KOPIKO ASTIG - Winner!  I always have a sachet of this at work, at home, and sometimes, in my bag!  cheap (5 php srp) + strong + available anywhere = winner 3 in 1 coffee

1.  COUNTRY STYLE - Fine, not that available BUT is is really good.  They also offer different flavors (my fave is almond) and refillable cups.  I think 39 php is okay for a perfect cup, fastfood type brand of brewed coffee.

My Groom and Maid-of-Honor (in one)

I have the best-of-honor -- my groom. 

I was actually a bit shock (in the beginning) and happy (later on) to witness on how much Bryan is into our wedding/marriage planning.  He is not the type of man I hear some brides-to-be complain about.  He is super hands on.  I feel that I am actually getting married with someone! :)

I first observed this trait during our first fight. Ganito yun…

We were at Café’ Breton flipping wedding magazines and brainstorming on the possibilities of a beach themed wedding.  Days before that, being me as a lover of the sand, sun and sea,  I already started imagining what the secondary sponsors would wear and what the decors would be.  I had a picture in my mind and those pictures were already real to me (anyway, most of the groom I talked with let their fiancée decide on some details).

But I was wrong.  Bryan questioned my ideas and debunked the picture I had in mind.  TADDDDAAAA!! --away mode!   The fight was between Mico who is used to deciding alone vs Bryan who adores the word togetherness. 

Since that night, I realized that the guy I am with pays and will pay attention to details. And yes, I super appreciate this now.  Believe it or not, he has never said “bahala ka na dyan” on any wedding element we have been discussing.  (as of July 21, 2012)--Winner! 

He is the type of groom who would roughly flip magazines, and tell me to check on the pages he folded (Kahit na naiinis ako, kasi gusto ko, naka post-it :P). He would also send me links of possible suppliers.  He would even study (with markers and lines) and compute the rates we have been handed out (sya kasi mostly magbabayad J).  Plusss, he photojourns!  He would give me these drawn random thoughts!  Ang cute!   Haaay, he made himself even more lovable! J

So, with the absence of my Maid-of Honor (she was in the US when I was writing this), I don’t feel lost in all this planning. I have the best groom and maid-of-honor!!!

we knew we just have to see what UP has to offer

usual planning set-up


Takaw meal after a tiring day